Spam of Truth and BBV Challenge #1

So, I just got a spam email and I couldn't help but read it and giggle.  Tell me if this couldn't be an actual conversation:

Dear Body Fat,

I'm done.

I'm sorry, but I...I just can't take this anymore.

Look, I don't want to hurt your feelings. It's been a long relationship, but it's over. It's gotta be over.

You have to see that, right?

C'mon. don't look at me like that...oh, are you crying?

Please don't...I hate to see you cry.

Seriously...listen, I just haven't been happy in a very long time. We've been through this, and I keep running away from having this conversation.

It's not working and we both know it.

No, don't say it is. You know it's not.

We can't go more than a few days without arguing. And whenever we're NOT fighting it's really just because
I'm sort of going along with whatever you want.  You've been around so long that I just let you run things.

You determine the way I eat, how I feel...even how I shop.

Just the other day in the mall, those jeans made my butt look amazing--the girl at the store even said so! I could see how jealous you were, unwanted body fat!  But it didn't matter, because YOU were there, and my
muffin top made me look ridiculous. I couldn't buy the jeans, just like I can't eat carbs--you're always
telling me what I CAN'T do.

I work my butt off to get into great shape, and no

matter what I do, there you are. Always right there on top of me. You're smothering me, can't you see that?

Oh, no don't you dare look at me like that. You know I'm telling the truth. And don't tell me you'll "back off" 
for a while.

That's BULL and You Know It!

You always feed me the same BS lines and I keep falling for it. The same thing happens, ALL the time.

We break up, we're back together, you're gone, you come back. Well, I'm tired of you coming back.
It's REALLY over this time. I'm taking you out of my phone. I've already unfriended you on facebook,
AND untagged all the pictures of us.

Please take back all the things you got me: the emotional baggage, the self-esteem issues, the fatigue from years of struggling.  I'm just...well, done with this. With us. 

Don't call or write. Don't even respond to this email.

Peace out. It's OVER.  Talk to you never.
Your Now Ex-Body



I think it's sadly, ridiculously, hilarious only because if I didn't laugh I would cry.  We try not to keep toxic people in our lives, so why on earth do we let ourselves have an on-again-off-again relationship with something that we feel like we need (ie bad food, sedentary lifestyle, etc.) that makes us wish and want for change and hacks our self esteem?  I let myself slide that direction over the Winter - I let stress be my excuse and fear be my underlying reason to not keep chasing more for myself.  And I'd never felt worse! 

As I close my first 90 Day Body by Vi Challenge, I've lost 16 pounds and a couple of pant sizes.  I've gained a renewed excitement for my fitness journey, goals and my weight loss.  I don't want to lose weight because I think I'm not okay, I want to lose weight to BE healthy and DO everything life has to offer.  The reckless abandonment that comes with feeling like I am living your potential.  My relationship with my weight holds me back whether I like it or not.  It's dysfunctional, and yet, when people reach out to me (which is happening more and more often) and saying they really relate to my blog, I realize "dysfunctional" might very well be the "norm" for us gals. 

My next 90 Day Challenge is upon me and it will be focused less on the poundage I want to lose, that will come.  I need it to be focused on my journey this time around.  I'm in search of a do-over.  A new fitness life that includes an exercise routine that doesn't leave me feeling lifeless by week's end.  I want to continue with the Body by Vi shakes because they have given me great results, and honestly, I feel awesome.  I have energy, I feel light inside and healthy and vibrant.  And I want to find a nutrition program to do in addition to the shakes that supports my active lifestyle, marathon and beyond.  Because that's what broke me last year.  Starving and exhausted can only last for so long.  I thank goodness I found the shakes, because it has led me back to healthier pastures and I'm happiest there.

So cheers, my fellow shake-drinkers!  And if you haven't had that "break-up" talk with you know who, take a deep breath and get it over with.  Buh-bye.